They Must Perceive that their Governors are Law-Compelled

I was reading Home Education for my podcast Everyday Charlotte yesterday afternoon and I came upon a part that I felt was a particularly important message that mother's need to hear... I felt convicted as usual, but even more-so understood what exactly might have been the initial trigger for issues I'm dealing with my children at home and our consistency in school.

Life comes at you hard sometimes, babies being born, job losses, car problems, maybe just busyness gets you and you find yourself looking at your consistency and it just isn't there. I think we all find ourselves there at some point.

Take a read and I hope you feel encouraged and inspired to move forward, like I do.

Home Education, Volume 1
Training and Educating Children Under Nine

Pg. 15

They must perceive that their Governors are Law-compelled. --

Where is the beginning of this tangle, spoiling the lives of parent and child alike? In this: that the mother began with no sufficient sense of duty; she thought herself free to allow and disallow, to say and unsay, at pleasure, as if the child were hers to do what she liked with. The child has never discovered a background of must behind his mother's decisions; he does not know that she must not let him break his sister's playthings, gorge himself with cake, spoil the pleasure of other people, because these things are not right. Let the child perceive that his parents are law-compelled as well as he, that they simply cannot allow him to do the things which have been forbidden, and he submits with the sweet meekness which belongs to his age. To give reasons to a child is usually out of place, and is a sacrifice of parental dignity; but he is quick enough to read the 'must' and 'ought' which rule her, in his mother's face and manner, and in the fact that she is not to be moved from a resolution on any question of the right and wrong. 

[You can also read it here on Ambleside Online with the surrounding paragraphs to get a better idea about where she is coming from in her point and where it leads further into other aspects of the raising of children.]

They must perceive that their Governors are Law-compelled. "Spoiling the lives of parent and child alike". These two statements had me feeling like I kind of got punched in the face. I feel like I haven't been showing my children a sufficient sense of duty. Although I often feel the mom guilt, guilt isn't enough. Earlier in the Preface she talks about The Way of the Will and the Way of Reason. You can hear the A Delectable Education Podcast discuss this subject Here


14. There are also two secrets of moral and intellectual self-management which should be offered to children; these we may call the Way of the Will and the Way of the Reason. 

15. The Way of the Will. -- Children should be taught -- 
(a) To distinguish between 'I want' and 'I will.'

Read this passage and more in the Preface, Here on Ambleside Online.

The Questions I asked myself after reading these two passages are: 

1. If I, as their Governor, do not show myself law-compelled by adhering to duty and responsibility in raising my children then how am I to expect this behavior, habit, and character to grow in my own children? 

2. Am I living my life raising my children as though I can do with them as I wish? Without any 'I must' parameters for myself? 

Just a few thoughts I thought I would share on my journey through Home Education

I would love to hear your thoughts! 

God Bless,

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